Agony in Victory, Joy in Defeat

Tiger Woods, Trevor Immelman, and Padraig Harrington. Quick, what do all three of this year's major winners have in common besides fat wallets? Time's up. Did you say all three were injured going into the tournament? If so you would be correct.

Harrington had a limp wrist, Immelman was previously chasing the golf ball in the form of a giant tumor on his neck, and Wood's metal infrastructure was cracked a bit. So logic dictates that the winner of the PGA Championship this year at Oakland Hills is going to be one gimpy golfer.

In a piece for Golfweek.com, Jeff Rude ponders who will be the next injured player to win this year. He mentions Aaron Oberholser's constant medical issues, David Tom's bad back, Vijay's Ribs, and even Tiger Woods hobbling down the fairway in crutches. But by not looking outside the box, Rude is missing the obvious choice: John Daly. SIDE NOTE: I'm starting a franchise called Vijay's Ribs, the profits sound delicious.

John Daly has been battling a multitude of ailments for some time right now. For one, his hyper-hooto-glycema (A severe need to ingest at least 30 Hooters Wings every day) has been acting up for the past month. Not to mention his Myto-coorsial-infarction (Excruciating desire to pound Coors Light).

But worst of all is his acute Bawiddaba Syndrome. (The overwhelming urge to hang out with Kid Rock). In the history of the PGA, nobody has ever won a tournament suffering from Bawiddaba. But in this strangest of years in golf, Daly could be the first ever to do it. With wings in one hand, tallboy of Coors in the other, and with Kid Rock caddying by his side, Daly could be well on his way to his second PGA championship. As long as he gets over his Grudenitis that is.

Jeff Rude's damaged goods.