Wiediculous!

Has anyone in the history of sports ever tried so hard to fail like Michelle Wie? Once again teeing it up with the men this week at the Reno-Tahoe Open, Wie has forgone the chance to qualify for the final major of the LPGA tournament, the Women's British Open. It's kinda like Kenny Perry's leave of absence at the Open Championship, only if the Open and the US Bank Championships switched fields. Instead of Paddy Harrington and The Shark you get Richard Johnson and Ken Duke.  

While Wie's playing partners for Thursday's round, Scott Sterling and Jimmy Walker, might not be Palmer and Player, playing on the PGA is still more difficult than the LPGA. On a side-note; I am greatly pleased to see that the star of "Good Times" has found work after acting. You could say that I think it's "Dy-no-mite." 

But back to Wie. Three years ago, the LPGA and it's fans alike, had great hope that Michelle Wie would do for their tour what Tiger did for the PGA. Energize the hardcore fan base, bring in new ones, and become a role model for young preppy women. But Michelle had other plans. She didn't just want to be Lady Tiger, she wanted to be Tiger himself.

Like Don Quixote, she went off fighting the valiant fight that had no cause, and had nothing to back it up. She has showed flashes of brilliance that fade away as quickly as they came. Last week at the State Farm Classic, she was in second place going into Sunday, but an unsigned scorecard quickly DQ'd her. Maybe these are the sort of things she would have known if she was to stick to one tour. 

Between random LPGA events, PGA events, and NCAA competitions at Stanford, her Blackberry is going to explode. These are three completely separate tours and levels from one another, each with different formats, and requiring varying styles of play. For a game that is often said to be "90% mental" that's one gigantic burden on the ol' cerebellum. 

So please, Michelle I beg of you, take a deep breath and relax. You have gotten so far ahead of yourself. Stick to the NCAAs for now, and fade into the background for a few years while honing your game. Then you can make your triumphant pro debut on the L-PGA tour where you will no doubt win more majors than Annika Sorenstam ever wished. Then you can tee it up with the boys of the P. Do all that and I would bet even money you become the first woman to make the cut since the legendary Babe Z.  But hey, if not, you can always fall back on the truckloads of money you're sure to make with the Nintendo smash-hit: Michelle Wii Golf. 

More Wie at The Los Angeles Times