Well the soap opera, "Bays of Our Lives" is finally coming to a close, and another twist is a fitting end to the story. As of late Wednesday night, it has become official that Brett Favre will be a New York Jet this fall. Even though it seemed like a long shot at first, the New Jersey Jets put together a compelling case for graybeard to throw bombs in the Meadowlands this year. Stolen from underneath Eric Mangini's Calzone at a Cosa Nostra hangout, I present you:The Top 5 Reasons Brett Favre Will Love The Jets
5. The Jet's Schedule is Cake.
This season the Jets will play only four games against teams that had winning records last year. The Patriots twice, San Diego, and Tennessee. They play four out of the five worst teams from last year, and the worst team, the Dolphins, twice. The only team in the bottom five they don't play against: The New York Jets.4. I Heart NY will be replaced by I Heart BF
New York will absolutely fall in love with country boy Brett. The New York media and New York fans have always had a special reverence for good ole boys. Whether it's the clean cut and affable Derek Jeter, or the hard-working David Lee, New Yorkers love blue collar guys. New York is such a melting pot of cultures that nobody cares where you're from, they just want you to be approachable and relate to them.
New York will absolutely fall in love with country boy Brett. The New York media and New York fans have always had a special reverence for good ole boys. Whether it's the clean cut and affable Derek Jeter, or the hard-working David Lee, New Yorkers love blue collar guys. New York is such a melting pot of cultures that nobody cares where you're from, they just want you to be approachable and relate to them.3. The Reunion with Bubba.
Favre will be arriving at training camp to the large arms and spit stained shirt of his old buddy Bubba Franks. The veteran tight end joined the Jets during the off-season after being realsed by the Packers. Anybody who counted out New York in the Favre-off was forgetting how much of a self-proclaimed country boy Favre is. Combine a friend named Bubba with the backwoods setting of the Jersey suburbs and Favre should feel right at home.
Favre will be arriving at training camp to the large arms and spit stained shirt of his old buddy Bubba Franks. The veteran tight end joined the Jets during the off-season after being realsed by the Packers. Anybody who counted out New York in the Favre-off was forgetting how much of a self-proclaimed country boy Favre is. Combine a friend named Bubba with the backwoods setting of the Jersey suburbs and Favre should feel right at home.2. The Jets Have a Deceptively Good Team.
The defense was a solid, middle of the road squad last year, statistically. But when you factor in two trips versus the thorn in their side, Patriots offensive juggernaut they rank much higher. With the addition of Buckeye bruiser Vernon Gholston and wiley veteran Kris Jenkins, they should be even better. The offense will be markedly better. The addition of Alan Faneca to the O-line will help Thomas Jones and new backup Jesse Chatman break open the running game. The wide receiver corp is already spectacular. Laverneus Coles and Jerricho Cotchery have always been on the cusp of the Pro Bowl. By replacing Pennington's pea-shooter with Favre's cannon expect them to be a dynamic duo this year.
The defense was a solid, middle of the road squad last year, statistically. But when you factor in two trips versus the thorn in their side, Patriots offensive juggernaut they rank much higher. With the addition of Buckeye bruiser Vernon Gholston and wiley veteran Kris Jenkins, they should be even better. The offense will be markedly better. The addition of Alan Faneca to the O-line will help Thomas Jones and new backup Jesse Chatman break open the running game. The wide receiver corp is already spectacular. Laverneus Coles and Jerricho Cotchery have always been on the cusp of the Pro Bowl. By replacing Pennington's pea-shooter with Favre's cannon expect them to be a dynamic duo this year.1. He Can Pull Off the Fur Coat
Move over Broadway Joe, Broadway Brett's moving in. No more suffering through the unbearable Wisconsin winters wearing crappy NFL issued vinyl jackets. After Namath's precedent was set its perfectly acceptable to rock the giant, puffy, fur coat in the Meadowlands. But instead of just paying tribute to the man, I say take it to the next level. Kill a grizzly bear, preferably with your hands, skin it, and wear that as your fur coat on your way to the Super Bowl. Not only will you replace Joe Namath as the number one Jet, you'll replace Chuck Norris as the number one badass.
Move over Broadway Joe, Broadway Brett's moving in. No more suffering through the unbearable Wisconsin winters wearing crappy NFL issued vinyl jackets. After Namath's precedent was set its perfectly acceptable to rock the giant, puffy, fur coat in the Meadowlands. But instead of just paying tribute to the man, I say take it to the next level. Kill a grizzly bear, preferably with your hands, skin it, and wear that as your fur coat on your way to the Super Bowl. Not only will you replace Joe Namath as the number one Jet, you'll replace Chuck Norris as the number one badass. 
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment