Don't Die at the Olympics

If you're traveling to Beijing for the 2008 Summer Olympics there's a few things I'd like to discuss with you. First: you're a little late. Flights to China take longer than you think and you DON'T want to be the last guy to walk into the opening ceremonies. Can you say EMBARRASSING?! It's going to take a little longer than an in-flight showing of the holiday classic, "Jingle All The Way" to fly from New York to Beijing.

Second: Life at the Olympics and Beijing are dangerous. It's not like living in your safe little Harlem 2-bedroom apartment. Nope, it's a different world over there in China.

I thought it would be only right to provide you with a couple of quick survival tips to help you get through your trip to this year's summer games alive. It's the "Don't Die at the Olympics" guide.

Let's begin. First of all, you've heard lots and lots about the polluted air over there in Beijing. You think it's hype? Think again. Washington Post blogger extraordinaire Dan Steinberg tried out a little experiment; survive a lengthy jog in the heart of smog-haven Beijing. Here are the frightening results:



Lesson learned? To avoid death, don't jog in Beijing.

The air isn't the only death trap over there. Sometimes the actual Olympic events can be just as death-defying. If you're a member of the sports media, an athlete, or just a crazy fan sneaking onto the playing surface, you MUST pay attention to your surroundings:



Ouch! To avoid death, know your surroundings.

And finally, when you're walking around China remember that the laws of the land are a bit different from that of the red, white, and blue. So before committing that crime it's important to note that in China:

Defendants can be put to death for criminal offenses, including nonviolent property crimes such as theft, embezzlement and forgery. In 1993, 77% of all executions worldwide were carried out in China.

On a single day, 9 January 1993, 356 death sentences were handed down by Chinese courts; 62 executions took place that day. During that year alone, 2,564 people were sentenced to death. At least 1,419 of them are known to have been executed.

Talk about swift penalties. You may want to keep those criminal tendencies hidden for the next couple of weeks. Good luck in Beijing and and we'll see you next time. Stay alive America.